Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt
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Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt

$21.95

  • Total: $0.00
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Estimated Arrival:
Place your order today to receive your item(s) between June 22 (US) and June 26 (EU).

Products are fulfilled and shipped from the United States.

Jun 13

Order Placed

Jun 15–Jun 17

Order Ships

Jun 22–Jun 26

Delivered

SKU: 24947BWOZZGIMH Category:
  • Carriers: UPS & USPS (U.S.), trusted global carriers (international).
  • Handling Time: 1–3 business days (varies by product).
  • Delivery Time: U.S. 3–8 days | Intl 15–30 days.
  • Costs: From $5.99 U.S. / $9.99 Intl (first item).
  • Tracking emailed when shipped.
  • No exchanges for size/color selections due to our made-to-order process.
  • Full Refunds within 30 days only if the error is ours (damaged, defective, or incorrect item/print).
  • Cancellation: within the first 12 hours.

Guarantee:

  • If an item arrives damaged, defective, or incorrectly printed, we will replace it (no extra fee) or issue a 100% refund.
  • Valid for 30 days after delivery.
  • Contact us with clear photos/videos for prompt resolution.

Description

If your brand of humor lives in the back row of a comedy club, you need this in your rotation. Meet Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt the kind of dark, stupidly specific tee that starts conversations, ends debates, and gets a few belly laughs. Wear it loud to a podcast taping, a late-night bar crawl, or a roast where subtlety went missing. Your friends will either snort with approval or pretend they didn’t see it either way, it’s earned its moment.

kurt metzger wearing the hannibal directive shirt militarygreen
Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt Militarygreen

Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt For Fans Who Get The Joke

This design reads like an inside joke with a megaphone. It lands for people who follow stand-up, listen to underground podcasts, or admire the sort of comedian who’ll say the thing everyone’s thinking but won’t say out loud. Think of it as a funny t shirt for dark humor fans the comedian shirt you reach for when you want to make a room uncomfortable in the best way.

kurt metzger wearing the hannibal directive shirt lightpink
Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt Lightpink

If you’re the friend who picks seats in the back and claps the loudest, this is your tribe. Great for comedy club nights, after-show hangs, podcast merch swaps, bachelor parties, and bar trivia where attitude matters more than accuracy. Give it to the pal who collects cringe-worthy anecdotes; they’ll wear it until the seams start begging for mercy.

Fit, Feel And Shipping Info

Good jokes deserve comfortable fabric, so this one actually wears like something you’ll keep on after the punchline lands.

  • Solid colors are 100% cotton on the classic Gildan G5000 / G6400 – soft, breathable, and not fussy.
  • Classic unisex fit that runs true to size – layers nicely under a flannel or over a long-sleeve on cooler nights.
  • Double-needle stitching at the hems so it survives washes, road trips, and overly enthusiastic hugs from fans.
  • High-quality print that stays sharp; the graphic won’t fade into a sad ghost after a couple of spins in the washer.
  • Printed in the USA, which means faster fulfillment and fewer surprises in shipping time.

We print and ship from the States, and if anything arrives crooked or wrong we’ll sort it quickly no drama, just fixes. Fast domestic shipping options available and friendly help if you need size advice.

Snag Kurt Metzger Wearing The Hannibal Directive Shirt now and bring the right kind of trouble to your next show, party, or podcast hangout. Add it to cart and let the jokes do the rest.

Size Chart

SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 18 in 28 in
M 20 in 29 in
L 22 in 30 in
XL 24 in 31 in
2XL 26 in 32 in
3XL 28 in 33 in
4XL 30 in 34 in
5XL 32 in 35 in
  • 5.3-ounce, 100% cotton (99/1 cotton/poly (Ash) & 90/10 cotton/poly (Sport Grey)
  • Heavyweight classic unisex tee
  • Taped neck and shoulders; Tearaway label
  • Decoration type: Digital Print
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH SLEEVE LENGTH
XS 16.50 in 27.01 in 8.62 in
S 17.99 in 27.99 in 8.90 in
M 20.00 in 29.02 in 9.17 in
L 22.01 in 30.00 in 9.45 in
XL 24.02 in 31.02 in 9.72 in
2XL 25.98 in 32.01 in 10.00 in
3XL 27.99 in 32.99 in 10.39 in
4XL 30.00 in 33.98 in 10.79 in
5XL 32.00 in 35.00 in 11.18 in
  • Made with 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)) that is easy to layer, breathable. Perfect for active and leisure wear.
  • The retail fit that is perfect for casual and semi-formal settings. The crew neckline adds a classic, neat style that's perfect for accessorizing.
  • Bella+Canvas manufactures all its products in the US and internationally in humane, no-sweat-shop, sustainable way and is part of the Fair Labor Association as well as Platinum WRAP certified.
  • The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations.
  • Fabric blends: Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton, 1% polyester; Heather colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester; Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester.
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 20 in 26 in
M 22 in 27 in
L 24 in 28 in
XL 26 in 29 in
2XL 28 in 30 in
3XL 29 in 32 in
4XL 32 in 33 in
5XL 34 in 34 in
  • Made with a medium-heavy fabric (8.0 oz/yd² (271 g/m²)) that consists of 50% cotton and 50% polyester for that cozy feel and warmth you need in a hoodie.
  • The classic fit along with the pouch pocket and the tear-away label make for a highly comfortable, scratch-free wearing experience.
  • The color-matched drawcord and the double-lined hood add a stylish flair and durability that tie everything together.
  • Made using 100% ethically grown US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. The blank tee's dyes are OEKO-TEX-certified dyes with low environmental impact.
  • Fabric blends: Heather Sport colors - 60% polyester, 40% cotton
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 20 in 26 in
M 22 in 27 in
L 24 in 28 in
XL 26 in 29 in
2XL 28 in 30 in
3XL 30 in 31 in
4XL 32 in 32 in
5XL 34 in 33 in
  • Made with a medium-heavy fabric blend of 50% cotton and 50% polyester (8.0 oz/yd² (271.25 g/m²)), this sweatshirt feels cozy and is the perfect choice for those colder months.
  • The classic fit along with the crew neckline deliver a comfy wearing experience with a clean-cut style. Meanwhile, the double-needle stitching at the shoulder, armhole, neck, waistband, and cuff seams add top-tier durability.
  • Say goodbye to itchiness thanks to the gray, pearlized tear-away label.
  • Made using 100% ethically grown US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. The blank tee's dyes are OEKO-TEX-certified dyes with low environmental impact.
  • Fabric blends: Heather Sport colors - 60% polyester, 40% cotton
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
S 18 in 28 in
M 20 in 29 in
L 22 in 30 in
XL 24 in 31 in
2XL 26 in 32 in
3XL 28 in 33 in
4XL 30 in 34 in
5XL 32 in 35 in
  • Medium fabric (6.0 oz/yd² (203 g/m²))
  • Classic fit
  • Runs smaller than usual
  • 100% cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
  • Sewn-in label
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
XS 16 in 27 in
S 18 in 28 in
M 20 in 29 in
L 22 in 30 in
XL 24 in 31 in
2XL 26 in 32 in
3XL 28 in 33 in
  • Medium fabric (5.3 oz/yd² (180 g/m²))
  • 100% Cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
  • Classic Fit
  • Tear away label
XS S M L XL 2XL
Width, in 13.98 15.00 15.98 16.97 17.99 18.98
Length, in 26.97 27.48 27.95 28.46 28.98 29.49
SIZE WIDTH LENGTH
YXS 16 in 20.5 in
YS 17 in 22 in
YM 18 in 23.5 in
YL 19 in 25 in
YXL 20 in 26.5 in
  • Made with 100%, midweight (5.3 oz/yd² (180 g/m²)), US cotton that feels soft to the touch and a great choice for any season.
  • The crew neckline along with the tee's classic fit, deliver a timeless style that is perfect for daily use.
  • All t-shirts come with pearlized, tear-away labels for total comfort and a scratch-free experience.
  • Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
  • Fabric blends: Heather colors - 50% cotton, 50% polyester, Sport Grey - 90% cotton, 10% polyester.